Congratulations on your top-scoring essay. To add polish to your expository writing skills, try the following activities:

• Click on the Model Essay link, and read the model essay closely. Compare it to your own essay. Identify two ways in which your essay and the model essay differ. What can you learn from these differences that will make you a better expository writer?

• Create your own model essay.

1. Consider other ways to open your essay. Remember that the opening lines should get your reader’s attention. Sometimes, a simple, direct, even blunt statement will do the trick, or you might want to begin with a thought-provoking question, a vividly described scene, or a forceful anecdote.

2. With expository tasks, writers often select a small number of important points before they begin to write, then develop each of these points into a well-developed paragraph. An expository thesis, or main idea statement, can include these points, briefly stated. Make a list of your major points, and if you haven’t already done so, work them into your thesis statement.

3. Check the beginning of each body paragraph. Make sure that it begins with a clear statement that develops your main idea. Check for transitions—words or phrases that smoothly link each paragraph opener to the preceding paragraph.

4. Re-read your conclusion. Make sure that it returns to your main idea and leaves your reader with something to ponder as well.

5. Give your essay an eye-catching title.

6. Add annotations to your essay. Label the thesis statement, each key point, and supporting ideas and details. Then, share your essay with a small group of classmates. Your annotations can help guide a discussion of your own model essay.

For an essay scoring 3

Congratulations. You’ve written a successful essay. But since there’s always room for improvement, try the following activities to strengthen your expository writing:

Click on the Model Essay link, and read the model essay closely. Compare it to your own essay. Identify two ways in which your essay and the model essay differ. What can you learn from these differences that will make you a better expository writer?

• Consider the possibilities.

Expository writing always explains something, but there are many approaches to writing that explains. The possibilities are endless. In this activity, you’ll examine the prompt for this expository essay and consider other ways to answer it.

1. With an open-ended expository prompt, you choose the topic for your essay—for example, a prompt that asks you to choose a personal hero and explain what makes this person heroic. Working with a classmate, examine your prompt. Is it open-ended? If so, continue with the steps below. If not, try activity number 2 below.

• With your partner, brainstorm a list of subjects that could be used to answer the prompt. If the prompt has asked you to choose a personal hero, make a long list of people who seem heroic to you.

• Select one of the subjects from your list. Make a list of all the things you know about this subject that could answer the question in the prompt.

• Consider writing a new essay for the prompt.The next time you encounter an open-ended expository prompt, brainstorm several subjects before you begin writing. Then, choose the best one—you’ll write a better essay.

2. A closed expository prompt gives you a specific subject to write about—for example, a prompt that asks you to consider the pros and cons of school uniforms. If yours is a closed prompt, try the following activity.

• Even an expository prompt that tells you what to write about will usually allow for a wide range of responses. Working with a classmate, brainstorm all the ways you can think of to answer the prompt you selected.

• Select the three strongest points from your brainstormed list.

• Consider revising your essay, using the material from your brainstorming.

For an essay scoring 2

Your score on this essay shows some success with expository writing. What can you do to get better at this kind of writing? Try the following activities:

• Click on the Model Essay link, and read the model essay closely. Compare it to your own essay. Identify two ways in which your essay and the model essay differ. What can you learn from these differences that will make you a better expository writer?

• Consider the details.

1. To improve your expository writing, practice the art of example and detail—of showing your reader what you mean. Choose one of the following sentences, and write it at the top of a sheet of paper. In the space beneath the sentence, write for ten minutes, with one goal: to use vivid examples and details to show your reader what the original sentence merely tells. Use one of the following sentences, or do the activity with a sentence of your own:

• My mother (or sister, brother, friend . . . ) is a dedicated person.

• Under stress, I sometimes behave poorly.

• Making a peanut butter sandwich is a simple and enjoyable experience.

• You need to dress with a job interview in mind.

2. Next, read over your own expository essay. Then, write each of your major points at the top of a sheet of paper—one sheet of paper per major point. On each sheet, make a list of the details and examples you used to show your reader what you meant. Finally, in the remaining space on the page, list as many new details and examples as you can.

3. Revise your essay, using some of the new details and examples to make it stronger.

For an essay scoring 1

Your score on this essay shows a need for further practice with expository writing. What can you do to learn more about this kind of writing? Try the following activities.

• Click on the Model Essay link, and read the model essay closely. Compare it to your own essay. Identify two ways in which your essay and the model essay differ. What can you learn from these differences that will make you a better expository writer?

• Organize your response.

1. Read the prompt closely. What does it ask you to explain?

2. On a fresh sheet of paper, brainstorm a list of all the things you can think of that can help you to explain what the prompt asks.

3. Examine your list, and choose three points that will help you to write a successful answer to the prompt.

4. Arrange your three points. Which one will you explain first? Which one will follow?

5. Now that your three points are in order, state them in a single sentence. This will be your thesis, or main idea statement—the heart of a successful expository essay. You can refer to the model essay for an example of an effective thesis or main idea statement.

For an Unscorable essay

Your essay has not been scored. The most common reason for this problem is that the essay doesn't focus on the assigned topic or doesn't use the assigned approach to the topic. To improve your ability to interpret an expository prompt and to write an expository essay, try one of the following activities:

• Click on the Model Essay link, and read the model essay closely. Compare it to your own essay. Notice how the model essay focuses on the assigned topic. Notice that the model essay is expository throughout—it explains the topic, as suggested by the wording in the prompt.

• Analyze your prompt.

1. Your prompt is at the top of this window. Print this window, and read your prompt closely. What topic does it ask you to write about? What does it ask you to explain? Read the prompt again. The first step toward writing a successful essay is taking the time to picture exactly what the prompt is asking you to do.

2. Read the prompt a final time and highlight what you looked for in step 1 above: the topic the prompt assigns and the instructions that tell you what or how to explain the topic.

3. Using your own words, write the topic on a fresh sheet of paper. Beneath the topic—using your own words again—write what you have been asked to explain in your essay.

4. Now, in the space below the two things you've listed, write a single sentence that states the topic and answers the question in the prompt. This will be your thesis statement, or main idea statement, for a new and successful attempt with this prompt.

5. Click on the Model Essay link and compare your thesis statement to the one in the model essay. If necessary, revise your statement until it is as strong as the model's.

6. Develop your new thesis into a complete essay, and submit it for scoring. Good luck.